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How to Get Someone to Fall in Love with You – Is It Science?

how to get someone to fall in love with you
Written by Health Coach Drew

Is there any science behind how to get someone to fall in love with you? Let’s find out. Perhaps you are seeking your “soul mate” or perhaps you feel that you have already found him or her… If you are looking for some answers about how to bring in “the One” for you, there is a formula to get someone to fall in love with you.

How To Get Someone To Fall In Love With You?

couple in loveTo love and be loved is a basic human need.  Each of us has a natural longing for a deep, heart centered connection with others. We seek this connection through friends, family and romantic partners.

Finding people who we are able to connect with on a deep personal level is often difficult, especially when it comes to romantic partners. Finding the right person and getting them to fall in love with you can seem like a daunting task. You may have also recently gone through a breakup and be wondering how to make your ex want you back.

Here are some steps to get you closer to having someone fall in love with you.

Before you spend a lot of time and effort going after that special someone, you need to ask yourself a very important question:

Are They Right for You?

How many times have you met someone or gone out on a date with someone and spent all your time and energy wondering if YOU were good enough for THEM??? You are nervous and insecure during the whole exchange and end up trying to change who YOU are to somehow make you feel like you are more worthy for THEM. Well, stop it. Building a true and lasting relationship based on love and respect needs to start with you making sure that THEY are good enough for YOU.

You should never, ever, ever have to change who you are to be with someone else. And that works the other way too. You should never expect someone else to change to be with you. We all are just the way we are. Some people can change temporarily but long term change is hard to stick. It’s better to be in a relationship where neither of you need to change anything to be together and make each other happy.

So if you find yourself trying to change things about yourself to get someone to fall in love with you, this is not the right approach.

8 Tips To Make Someone Fall In Love With You

happy couple1. Get Clear on What You Want in a Relationship

Make a wish list of all of the qualities that are important to you in a mate. Get clear on what is non-negotiable and what areas offer some flexibility. Consider personality qualities, personal habits, sexual preferences, social qualities, financial issues, commitment level, and other aspects that are important to you in a relationship.

You have to know what you want and don’t want before you are able to attract the right person to you. Be honest with yourself and with them about what you want and do not want.

2. Be Confident in Yourself

You have a lot to offer the right person. You need to know who you are and have confidence that you are good enough for the person that you are meant to be with. People do not want to be with someone who is pretending to be someone they are not. Confidence is highly attractive quality, so believe in yourself.

Here are 5 tips to help boost your confidence.

If the two of you don’t hit it off, no big deal.  It simply wasn’t the right match. Which leads me to my next point…

3. Know That There are Other People Out There

Don’t get caught up in the belief that this person is the only possible one for you – especially before you have not even started dating. If you get caught in this, you are much more likely to come off as desperate or overbearing. Relax. They might be a perfect match for you, and you may have a wonderful relationship ahead of you. They might not.  If they aren’t, it’s not the end of the world. That simply means that he or she was not the right one for you. Be patient. Get out there and meet some new people.

4. Be A Good Listener

Listening is a powerful way to connect with another person. It has been said that having someone truly listen to you is so close to the feeling of being loved that they are sometimes virtually indistinguishable.

In order to listen effectively, you must be fully present. This means that you need to put down your phone, turn off the TV or computer, sit down and give them your full attention. Make eye contact. Empathize with them. Validate them. Listen to them fully without interruption. Ask questions about what they are talking about – show that you are interested in them and what they have to say.

Avoid the following:

  • Giving advice and trying to ‘fix’ their problem for them
  • Minimizing their feelings with platitudes like “everything is going to be okay”
  • Making jokes about something that is important to them
  • Interrupting their story by telling your own

5. Validation and Appreciation

Everyone wants to feel appreciated. It simply feels good to have someone acknowledge you and appreciate something about you or something that you have done. Take time to notice the little things that he or she does that you appreciate and let them know. Show your gratitude.

6. Take Care of Yourself

One of the greatest gifts that you can offer another person is to show up as a fully healthy you. This is by no means saying that you must be perfect before someone will fall in love with you, but it is important that you love yourself enough to take good care of yourself on all levels.

Taking care of your health, your physical appearance, and your emotional well-being show the world that you know you are important and deserving of love and nurturing. This energy will radiate from you and others will long to connect with you.

7. Take Time to Get to Know Each Other

Be curious. Learn about them. Find out what they are passionate about and what they enjoy. Show a genuine interest in who they are and what they love (be genuine about this – don’t fake it. Be open to trying new things and learning, but be real with them, too. You can’t build a relationship on lies). Have fun learning about them and getting to know them.
Share your own passions as well. Let them learn about and explore things that are important to you.

Spend quality time together doing things that you both enjoy. Embrace them for who they are and allow them to embrace you for who you are. Develop a bond between you and build trust. Be a supportive friend, and allow them to support you. Build trust in each other.

8. Have Fun

falling in loveIf you walk into a date with the same gloominess as if you are about to do your least favorite chore, things will go south very badly. Same is true if you are overly nervous or stressed out about the experience. Your life and your happiness are not actually hanging in the balance, so you may as well relax and have a good time. Think of it as a new adventure. You are getting to explore and learn about a new person and, just maybe, it will lead to something bigger.

You are much more attractive when you are confident and having fun.  The ability to have fun, to laugh and make someone laugh is one of the most attractive qualities in a person – far more so than physical appearance alone. If you are super stressed out before your date, call up a friend who can help you loosen up, watch a silly comedy, or do something else to help you find the joy in the experience regardless of the outcome.

How you show up plays a big part in getting someone to fall in love with you.

While there is more science behind love, simply being confident in yourself can go a long way. Know what you want in a relationship. Be open to fun and adventure. And most importantly, know that you are an amazing person who is deserving of love and affection.

About the author

Health Coach Drew

HI, MY NAME IS DREW. I'm a certified health coach and nutrition expert. My goal is to take the confusion out of weight loss and healthy living and make it simple for everyone. Take The 21-Day Smoothie Diet Challenge

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